Monthly Archives: August 2009

Could it be they both are wrong?


Over the last three years of marriage my wife and I have come to a “relationship changing realization”. The normal assumption from both parties in an argument is that someone has to be right, so both sides of the argument fight with the thought that the person holding the opposing view will give in to their logic, emotion, and opinion and concede. However, after several heated, intense, unnecessary, and long arguments my wife and I realized something that we believe would help other relationships.

Maybe both of us are wrong!?!

After a slew of accusations went from both sides of the kitchen table we have realized that many times, both of us are right which means both of us are wrong. I would mention several examples here; however, I believe your imagination of these conversations is more fitting for your life than the examples I would give. Just take a moment and picture the last episode of verbal battle you and your wife engaged in.

You may ask what the above picture has to do with what has been said. Obviously and thankfully, this is not a picture of me and my wife. The picture represents two polarized factions inside the world of “Christianity”. The vast majority of us live between these two worlds and often get falsely labeled as a member of either group. We are not lawless – God forbid. We are not legalistic – adding man made tradition to saving work of Jesus Christ. Do we sit in a horse in buggy in our home-made clothes, or do we look like we walked out of an ad for a merger between Starbucks, Abercrombie & Fitch, and a boy band?

One person says, “Music is amoral and as long as the words are not bad then the music is okay.” While another person says, “We should avoid the black keys on the piano and avoid a syncopated rhythm”.. Could it be they both are wrong?

One person says, “God is completely in control so how we live and what we do doesn’t matter”. While another person says, “God is not involved in this world so we hold the keys to heaven and hell”. Could it be they both are wrong?

One person says, “Talking about modesty is out-dated and doesn’t belong in our world today”. While another person says, “If you do not sew from the same pattern I use, you will go astray”. Could it be they both are wrong?

I could go on and on with these, and I am sure you could as well. However, if I did it would make my blog post as silly and pointless as many conversations that will go in the Christian world today. I am not advocating that we should cease having conversations about right and wrong, truth and error; I would just like for both sides to look at across the table as my wife and I did and say “Could it be that we both are are wrong?”  and then set aside their engrained preconceived ideas on the subject and open the Word of God and let it have a voice in our argument.